


Recruitment Skyrocketed

by Jaetion



Series: Love That Dirty Water [5]
Category: Fallout (Video Games), Fallout 4
Genre: Attempt at Humor, Brotherhood of Steel (Fallout), Developing Relationship, Fluff and Humor, Friendship, Gen, Inspired by Fanart, Not Beta Read, Teasing
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-03-08
Updated: 2019-03-08
Packaged: 2019-11-13 17:11:56
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,970
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18035738
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Jaetion/pseuds/Jaetion
Summary: It was a whole other side to Paladin Danse - In a literal sense. She’d drawn Haylen’s CO in his favorite power armor. Or some of it at any rate. Leg up, salute, bare thighs, bare chest, that smile… The usually dignified and maybe a little daunting paladin made an absolutely perfect pin-up model.





	Recruitment Skyrocketed

**Author's Note:**

> The artist of the gorgeous and hilarious recruitment poster featuring pin-up Danse is Crystal Graziano (http://www.crystalgraziano.com/). She has the print for sale on her etsy. And obviously Scout Graziano is named after her. 
> 
> There's a mod that puts the picture in the game as a settlement decoration and yes I stick it above every bed I build.

Early 2288, Prydwen

\---

It was incredible. In fact, it was “Outstanding,” Haylen breathed the paladin’s favorite superlative. With a surprise that was an equal mix of delight and disbelief, she stared at the draft of the recruitment poster until Scribe Graziano snickered.

“I have to say I’m pretty proud of it!”

“I can see why,” Haylen replied without moving her eyes away from the drawing. Graziano had always been one of the greatest artists (not that there were many of them in the Brotherhood) but this time she’d produced something that practically defied explanation. When she’d grabbed Haylen and hauled her over into a dark corner of one of the platforms in the Prydwen’s bowels, she’d been giggling so hard that all she’d be able to do was unroll her latest work.

It was a whole other side to Paladin Danse - In a literal sense. She’d drawn Haylen’s CO in his favorite power armor. Or some of it at any rate. Leg up, salute, bare thighs, bare chest, that smile… The usually dignified and maybe a little daunting paladin made an absolutely perfect pin-up model.

As handsome as he was, Danse was on a pedestal - not just for her, but for a lot of the Prydwen’s crew who watched him with appreciation. But from a distance. And Haylen - she admired the man. Respected him! But she wasn’t blind. The muscles. God, the muscles. Not just the biceps, but those legs. And the hair!

Any passing soldiers would think that the scribes were just being industrious, trading intel after a mission, maybe sharing documents they’d recovered. Instead there they were, smirking and flushing like initiates in their first shared shower. Speaking of - Haylen could use a cold one.

“Hey, it was a lot of work! Do you know how many hours I had to spend staring at him? I’m surprised he didn’t write me up for insubordination.” Graziano paused for a second as she considered it. “Or for being creepy.” 

Haylen clicked her tongue. “Danse is a fair CO, but I’m pretty sure he’ll eject you from the Brotherhood if he sees this.”

“Or off the Prydwen.”

Shaking her head, Haylen rolled the drawing back up to return it to the other scribe... but then opened it again for another appraising stare and chuckle. 

Pleased with Haylen’s reactions, the other scribe crossed her arms pompously across her chest. “Notice the detailing in his eyebrows. Some of my finest work. Nice, aren’t they? Didn’t think eyebrows could be, but Paladin Danse is full of surprises. And here, see, I was going for saucy rather than brazen; I think there’s an important distinction. You know, for the discerning viewer.”

“I’m just… Yep. Yep, totally. Those eyebrows sure are perfect. I never really noticed them before. And that stomach -”

“Ab victoriam, am I right?” 

“Abs pectoriam!”

Both she and Graziano burst into laughter, more than the joke deserved. When they recovered, Graziano flicked at the corner of the drawing. “So maybe I should try to get some printed. Make some caps on the side? Hoult thinks that Publick Occurrence has a printing press.”

Haylen glanced sideways at the other scribe, the tears in her eyes making Graziano blurry. “And what, plaster them around Diamond City?”

“Think about how many new recruits we’d get! I sure as hell would join! Again, I mean. Whatever - You get what I’m saying.”

“I was thinking more about hanging it around the base for morale,” Haylen giggled out the last part. She cleared her throat, trying to get her tone serious, “A little bit of artwork does wonders for the decor…”

They both dissolved into gasping giggles again. Felt good to laugh, after everything they’d been through. Even if it were at poor Danse’s expense. The more Haylen laughed, the more Graziano puffed up, which made Haylen laugh harder until they were both barely propping themselves upright.

“Hey, isn’t that your new knight?” The other scribe wheezed as she pointed down the hall at the new recruit. “How’d you end up with such a good-looking squad?”

“Just my luck, I guess,” Haylen said wryly. Dawes, Worwick, Brach, and Keane hadn’t been so fortunate. Before the threads of depression could wrap around her again, she waved at Marcos Reyes, whose silly nickname “Goose” matched his affability. Unlike Rhys and Danse, he had a sense of humor. “What do you think - Should we give him a new perspective of his sponsor?”

Graziano met Haylen’s wicked grin. “I think we need to. It’ll be a dereliction of duty if we don’t.”

She knew she liked him from that first night, when he’d plunged into the horde of ghouls for three strangers. Before the Prydwen had arrived, they’d worked together to turn the police station into a more liveable fortification and she’d gotten to know Goose. He’d been a sympathetic ear as she recounted the journey from the Capital to the Commonwealth, about what had happened on their way to Cambridge. The Brotherhood was full of good men, but good friends were a harder find.

He strolled over and greeted them both with his usual smile, which stood out bright and white against his bronze skin. “You guys look like you’re enjoying yourselves.”

The introductions went quickly - Haylen saw how Goose’s eyes flicked to the rolled poster in her hands. She and Graziano looked up and the down the hallway (secure) and then she motioned him closer. He bent down obligingly and like the poster was some sacred pornographic text, she carefully unveiled the treasure.

To a stunned silence broken only by Graziano’s squeal of gratification.

Not just surprise - captivation registered on Goose’s features. His eyes widened and his eyebrows disappeared under his military cap, and his expressive mouth actually hung open. “Jesus.” His gaze traveled down, back up. Back down. 

“So?” Graziano prompted eagerly.

“Wow, it sure it... That’s… You really captured the uh, crux of Danse.” After another sweep over Danse’s cheeky pose he laughed too, which got Granizano going again. Which got Haylen going again too. 

“Recruitment poster,” the other scribe announced, gesturing grandly. “Think about how many people would join with him as our figurehead.”

“It’s a little more than just his head,” Haylen said and Goose snickered again. 

When she held it out to him, he took the drawing and said with a contemplative frown, “This proves it: his ass truly is a work of art.” 

“Right?” Graziano exclaimed in delight. “I’d train under him any day, if you know what I mean.”

“He really is something.” After a moment he shook his head and murmured something in Spanish to himself. “No he pensado en…”

The likelihood of the stoic Danse confessing his feelings to her was about the same as Maxson taking them all to Nuka-World. However scribes were perceptive, and Haylen had started to suspect that there was something between Goose and their paladin. Somehow just fulfilling his duty didn’t exactly explain the enthusiasm Danse had for joining Goose on missions. But the knight was still wearing his wedding band.

Haylen nudged at Goose’s arm with her shoulder. When he jolted back to attention, she joked, “On a scale of one to murder, how mad do you think Danse would be if he saw this? Actually I think he’d be more annoyed that he’s wearing the armor improperly.”

“This is unacceptable - No Brotherhood soldier would go out so poorly equipped.” Goose said, lowering his voice into Danse’s baritone.

A wide grin broke across Haylen’s face. Goose, rara avis indeed! “You sound just like him!”

“Affirmative,” Goose replied in the same spot-on impression. “Scribe, this outfit is tactically irresponsible. As a Paladin of the Brotherhood, I order you to ensure that my assets have ample cover.”

Graziano snapped into a flawless salute that crumbled almost immediately as she laughed again. “Sir! I will work on your ass immediately!”

“Outstanding. I believe these could be distributed as airborne leaflet propaganda. Haylen, I want the Commonwealth to see the true glory of the Brotherhood.”

“Yes sir, right away sir. And may I commend you on really doing justice to that power armor?”

Goose frowned with all of Danse’s solemnity. “Thank you, scribe. We should all work to embody the best of the Brotherhood’s traits. Emphasis on body.”

“Outstanding,” Haylen said in her own attempt at impersonation

“You got to draw it out,” Goose advised. He said again in that deep timbre of Danse’s, “Outstanding.”

“Outstanding.”

“Too much. Outstanding.”

“Outstanding.”

“Outstanding.”

“Outstanding.”

“Yeah, there you go! Scribe, that was outstanding.”

Graziano wiped at her eyes. “Oh my God, you really sound like him. I can almost see him now - I bet he’d blow a gasket if he heard you.”

“Gambling is forbidden aboard the Prydwen, scribe.”

Bent over in laughing agony, all Haylen could do was helplessly grab at Goose’s arm. Which was suddenly stiff. “That was your best Paladin Danse -”

“Yes?” said someone else, and this time there was no way to mistake where it came from. So much for her so-called skills in perception; maybe if she hadn’t been chortling and chuckling with all the sensibility of a ghoul, maybe she would have realized that right behind them was -

“Paladin Danse!” Goose and Haylen said together and Graziano - all sly bravado gone now - just squeaked.

They spun and clasped their hands behind their backs as they jolted to attention. Out of the corner of her eye she saw Goose roll the drawing up. Hoping that she wasn’t blushing like a guilty child, she jerked her eyes back to Danse. Up from that wide chest, broad shoulders, sensitive mouth, and yep, Graziano was right, nice eyebrows. Suddenly she felt paper slap against her hands as Goose passed the poster to her. As if she wanted to be caught with it! Like it was a particularly deadly baton she quickly shoved it at Graziano.

“At ease,” Danse said, looking more puzzled that anything else. Haylen allowed herself a tiny exhale of relief - He hadn’t overheard any of it or seen the poster. They’d all live to see another day. “I won’t write you up, but try not to lose too many caps.”

“Us? Never!” Goose declared cheerfully. “In fact we were just talking about how highly we value the uh, tenets of the Brotherhood.”

“Is that so?”

Mischiefness took the place of subsiding panic, and Haylen couldn’t help herself: “We find them invigorating, sir.”

“Very robust,” Goose agreed. His gaze flickered over at Graziano, who was still frozen like she was expecting the paladin to smite her where she stood, and started to steer Danse away. “I could use a drink. Or a row of them. Right now. How about we see what Proctor Teagan scrounged up?” 

Haylen stepped up to Danse’s other side to help hustle him forward. He let himself be propelled toward the mess hall, but he was frowning in confusion. Or maybe just frowning. She cleared her throat and announced, “Paladin Danse, I think I owe you a beer.”

“For what, Haylen?”

“For being a good CO,” she explained lamely, though Danse seemed flattered by the reason. 

“Bribery isn’t necessary. Really, I wasn’t going to report you.”

They were nearly the same height so Goose could put his arm over Danse’s shoulder. The knight said to Danse in a tone that sounded almost gallant, “Another reason why you deserve it.”

“Well, all right.”

“And Graziano,” Haylen called down the hallway to other - pale, perhaps a little sweaty - scribe. Graziano startled and immediately whisked the drawing behind her back again. “Can I get a copy of that - um - map when you get a chance? Actually, can you make it two?”

Maybe Goose would like to study it, she thought, watching Danse’s frown shift into a smile that was just as attractive as the one on the poster.


End file.
